by Angela, of the Wishadoo! Community
It's Easter morning -- the most important day of the year for Christians.
Even those of us
whose faith is tenuous find it in ourselves at Easter, and come together
in houses of worship to praise and be thankful for salvation.
Although I was raised in the Christian tradition, and still hold in my
heart many of those tenets (Love Thy Neighbor, Do Unto Others as You
Would Have Them Do Unto You, What You Do For the Least of These You Do
For Me, etc.),
I consider myself more of a "sampler" of religions -- I
find what speaks to my heart and adopt that as my "religion". Many
people take issue with that, but in my humble opinion, religion is a
personal choice. It is a way to communicate with God/Spirit/The
Universe/My Higher Self, so why shouldn't it be personalized to what
works for me? (AND, I'm off on a tangent) Regardless of your
religion, however, it's still a lovely time to be with family and
celebrate and be thankful for the return of springtime. After a long
night of rain, we're seeing a glimpse of sunlight and hearing the lilt
of birdsong, so our fears of a wash-out were unfounded.
I awoke around
dawn this morning, went to check on my elderly mother -- my beloved mama
-- and made the coffee. She was still sleeping peacefully and looked
so warm and cozy that I didn't have to heart to wake her, so she's still
asleep, and I get One More Day with her. We had talked about going to
church today, and that could still happen, but right now she's so
peaceful, I refuse to interrupt her slumber. We have so few peaceful
nights that I consider this a heavenly gift, and I will not ruin it by
forcing her to get up and get ready for church. She doesn't do well
when she's rushed or being forced, so we'll see how the day goes. We
may make it to church, and we may not. Perhaps we'll pack a picnic
lunch and go to the park. What better way to give thanks for creation
than to be in nature (or as close an approximation as we can get in the
city) and appreciating it for a while. It's supposed to be very warm,
finally, so she'll enjoy being out in the sun and watching the kids.
This is my first
time blogging on Wishadoo. Dena asked me to write about my experiences
being a care-giver, and until now I haven't had to energy or time or
nerve or whatever to do it, but this morning seemed like a good time for
a new beginning, given the symbolism of this day. So, here's it is --
my very first blog entry.
In the past few
years, I've weathered challenges and hardships I would never have
thought I'd have the strength to face, but face them I have, with as
much Grace as I could pull from within myself. And you know what? When
I had no more Grace myself, someone would always come along to share
theirs with me. There are angels among us -- I have absolutely no doubt
about that -- from the kind gentleman who helped me when I broke the
heel of my shoe and fell into the road in heavy traffic, to the kind
lady from the animal shelter who gave us cat food when we couldn't
afford to buy it, to the kind online friend who generously offered to
help me find work-from-home employment so that we can have some sort of
income, to dear friends who have helped us with financial and moral
support, to kind strangers who have helped us out financially, to my
sweet cousins who have helped us out with tangibles and with loving
support, to the compassionate and loving soul who created Wishadoo so
that we'd have a place to gather. Plus, there are so many people who've
crossed our path, helped us in some way, and gone on their way --
sometimes without telling us their names -- and I have no way of
thanking them personally. These are angels among us.
I know that her
condition is degenerative, and will eventually take her from us, so my
concern for now is making what time she has left on this planet as
pleasant and uncomplicated for her as possible. People say to me
"you've given up your life to care for her. why don't you put her in a
nursing home?" and I understand their concern is for me, but as I've
tried to explain to them, my life will continue long after she's gone
and there may come a time when I can no longer give her the care she
needs, but for now I can, and I get ONE MORE DAY. And for that I am
thankful.
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